What Makes a Godly Father? | 1 Thessalonians 2:11-12

What does biblical fatherhood look like?

In this Father's Day lesson, we explore Paul's description of spiritual fatherhood in 1 Thessalonians 2:11-12 and discover three essential responsibilities of a godly father: exhorting, encouraging, and charging those under his care.

Drawing from Paul's relationship with the Thessalonian Christians, this lesson examines how fathers, mothers, mentors, and church members can reflect the heart of God by walking alongside others, emotionally connecting with them, and helping them pursue a life worthy of God's calling.

In this lesson you'll learn:

• What it means to "exhort" someone by walking alongside them
 • Why encouragement requires emotional connection, not just advice
 • How godly fathers provide purpose, direction, and vision
 • The connection between earthly fatherhood and God's love for His children
 • Why the church plays a vital role in supporting the next generation
 • How Christians are called to walk worthy of God's kingdom and glory

Ultimately, this lesson points us to our Heavenly Father—the One who faithfully calls His children into His kingdom, walks with them through life, and never abandons them.

Key Text: 1 Thessalonians 2:11-12

"Like a father with his children, we exhorted each one of you and encouraged you and charged you to walk in a manner worthy of God."

If this lesson encouraged you, please like, subscribe, and share it with someone who is striving to lead their family or influence others for Christ.

#FathersDay #ChristianParenting #BiblicalFatherhood #1Thessalonians #FaithfulFather #ChristianFamily #Parenting #ChurchOfChrist #WalkWorthy #SpiritualLeadership

Transcript

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SPEAKER_00 0:06

Good morning. Turn over to First Thessalonians. First Thessalonians chapter 2. Go ahead and mark that and then turn over to John chapter 17. This morning we are taking a little break from our sermon series out of Romans, and we're looking at fathers today. And everything we talk about this morning will apply not just to fathers, but also to the mothers, friends, and also the church as well. I also want to welcome everyone here. There's a good number here. It's good to see everyone. It's always good to have as many people as we can to just come together and to worship God. It's encouraging to me, and I hope it's encouraging to you as well. I want to ask a question, though. Why do we have children? Right? The funny part is why do we have two children? Or three, right? We know how hard it is, and we know what we're getting into. Why do we continue to have more and more and more children? We do so because I think because we have love to give. Think about that for a moment. Even though parenting is, like I said, difficult and it has its stresses, and you know, the world can be full of its challenges, and not everyone is born equal. We as parents have love that we want to share with that child. The same is true for God, the triune God, that has love, and he had love for us before the foundation of the world that he wants to share with us. That's what we see in John chapter 17. John chapter 17, we see this relationship of a parent and a child. This is Jesus in his prayer, and in this prayer, he says this near the end, verse 24. To see my glory that you have given me because you loved me before the foundation of the world. O righteous Father, even though the world does not know you, I know you, and these know that you have sent me. Right? Notice how knowing is tied to this idea of love. Verse 26. I may known to them your name, and I will continue to make it known that the love with which you have loved me may be in them and I in them. So this love that the Father has for the Son, he wants us to share. A parent-child relationship on a cosmic level. And Jesus wants his disciples, including us, to experience that love. That love that existed before the world even existed. That's pretty special. Today, though, we're talking about that father-child, father-son relationship here. It doesn't have to be biological, it can be spiritual. And what we're specifically looking at is Paul and how he was a father to the churches that he helped establish. Specifically here in 1 Thessalonians this morning. Look at chapter 2, because he compares his ministry to being a father and a mother to these Christians. He starts off in verse 7 by saying, like a mother. But we were gentle among you, like a nursing mother, taking care of her own children. So being affectionately desirous of you, we were ready to share with you not only the gospel of God, but also our own lives. Does not not sound like Jesus, right? What we read in John 17? Because you had become very dear to us. And then you keep going in that same chapter a little lower, and he brings out how they were like fathers. And verse 11. For you know how like a father with his children, we exhorted each one of you and encouraged you and charged you to walk in a manner worthy of God who calls you into his own kingdom and glory. And this will be the passage, the verses that we'll look at specifically this morning in detail. But I want you to look at what Paul says there. Because the English is not as specific or as detailed as the Greek often is. But as a father, he says, we exhorted and we encouraged and we charged. Specifically, though, how did Paul do that with the church here in Thessalonica? So they can walk in a manner that's worthy of God. Let's look at that first one, this idea of exhorting. Like a father, we exhorted each one of you. Not necessarily something we use in our everyday vocabulary, but when you look at this word in the Greek, it's this idea that I'm going to come alongside. I'm going to come alongside and I'm going to walk in this life with you. Interestingly enough, it's the same Greek word that is used in John verses chapters 14, 15, and 16 to describe the comforter, the advocate, the Holy Spirit. But that's this idea. This idea, I'm going to come alongside and I'm going to walk with you. I don't know about you, but when my child is just stressing out, freaking out, it's it's so empowering for them when I can come alongside them and I can urge them to keep going. It gives them a certain level of confidence that they otherwise didn't have. And so you can think of this church here, these new Christians in Thessalonica who are maybe unsure in their newfound faith and belief, how wonderful it is to have someone like Paul that can walk alongside them in this journey. A father figure, someone who has seen the risen Christ, who has been persecuted himself, and has also strengthened so many other Christians now to have him there as a father. Paul even points this out that look, just as I was persecuted, you are going to be persecuted. In fact, you've already gone through some suffering. Look at chapter 1 and look at verses 6 through 7. First Thessalonians chapter 1, look at verses 6 through 7. It says here in verse 6, and you became imitators of us and of the Lord, for you received the word in much affliction, with the joy of the Holy Spirit, the exhorter, so that you became an example to all who to all the believers in Macedonia and Achaia. What do we see here? We see these men, yes, go through suffering and persecution, but they're not going through it alone. These men here are imitating Paul, they're imitating the Lord, and what's Paul doing here? Paul is simply just imitating God. He is literally just acting in accordance with God's character. And this is exactly what God wants from us. It's what he does with us. We cannot think that God is somehow distant, that he stands off and he stands off and he just shouts instructions at us. That is the wrong view of God. In fact, God, the God that we worship and live for, actually comes with us. When I think of the greatest example of God's exhortation to come alongside us, it's the incarnation itself. It's the Father who sent the Son to walk amongst us, to suffer with us, to urge us to live a life that is worthy of Him. And when the Sun ascends, when we read that, it's not that God is gone. No, He's still here. The exhorter himself comes alongside. The Holy Spirit is here amongst us. God does not abandon us. I will never leave you nor forsake you, we are told. That is the echo of a father. A father who shows up, a father who is active, and it's something that we should reflect as well as fathers to our own children. Now, sometimes that word exhort there can be translated, because they're interchangeable sometimes, as urge or even to encourage. Flip over to chapter four, 1 Thessalonians chapter 4, where Paul exhorts them here, urges them to walk in holiness here. Verses 1 through 5. 1 Thessalonians 4, chapter chapter 4, verses 1 through 5. He says, Finally, then, brothers, we ask and urge you in the Lord Jesus that as you receive from us, so we urge you, right? Exhort you as you receive from us how you ought to walk and to please God just as you are doing, that you do so more and more, for you know what instructions we gave you through the Lord Jesus. For this is the will of God, your sanctification, that you abstain from sexual immorality, that each of you know how to control his own body and holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God or do not love God. This idea here that he wants to walk with them in their sanctification as they become more and more like Christ. What does Paul do here? He actually, this is important for us as fathers and parents and influence, people who influence others. We need to actually name that struggle. Paul doesn't just give this vague, feel good type of encouragement, and that hopefully, you know, you'll figure it out. You should just keep on going. He actually comes alongside them and speaks directly to what they are dealing with. That's what a father does. A father who truly comes alongside their kids, knows what they are, and they're walking with them, knows what they're going to be walking up against. What they're coming up against. You can't walk alongside one and not know what they're walking into. This is a father who knows their children. And that's a calling for us as well. Not to be distant, not to stand off, not to manage our kids even from a distance, but to actually get involved in a way that's that's active in their life, into their real life struggles, and to urge them to continue to love God more and more. What you should be seeing here is Paul painting a picture when we go back to our main text in 1 Thessalonians chapter 2 of what a father is like when he exhorts and he encourages and he charges. Not only does he come alongside, but as we'll see here, a father encourages as well. For now you know, like a father with his children, we exhorted each one of you and we encouraged you. We encouraged you. That idea here of encouraged is not just to come alongside, but to deliver speak to you, to talk to you, to comfort, it's sometimes translated. There's an emotional quality here. In fact, to give you an example, you can turn over to John chapter 11, but in verse 31, you can see it up on the screen. When Mary here is grieving the death of Lazarus, the Jews here are consoling, they're comforting, they are encouraging her. John 11, verse 31. When the Jews who were with her in the house, encouraging her, consoling her, saw Mary rise quickly and go out. They followed her, supposing that she was going to the tomb to weep there. They encouraged and consoled. I have three daughters. I don't know what it's like for boys, but I'm doing a lot of this with just my three three daughters. I feel like every adjustment, slightest adjustment, is almost a death level change at times. But I've learned something. I've learned that encouragement isn't just this, yeah, they're there, and just kind of pat them on the back, and it'll be alright. Well, that's nice to do. On a deeper level, to encourage is to actually emotionally connect with that person. And this applies not just to fathers, but the spouses, the children, our spiritual family. In John chapter 11, the Jews are doing that, they're consoling Mary, and that is great. But soon, what happens if we know the story? Jesus comes onto the scene, and what does he do? He emotionally connects. Jesus weeps. He weeps for someone he loves, and he weeps with those whom he loves. And that is encouragement. I love Isaiah 40, verse 11. This depiction of a shepherd with his flock, of God with us, that he will tend his flock like a shepherd, he will gather the lambs in his arms, he will carry them in his bosom, and gently lead those that are with young. What a picture of encouragement. Picture of a father to his children who encourages. Not saying you have to weep every time your child weeps, but there should be an understanding of where they are emotionally coming from. So that we can emotionally connect, so that we can, like a shepherd to his flock, we can gather in our arms, we can hold them tight, we can lead them, and we can lead them gently. In this world that is often unfamiliar to them, in this world that is big, dark, and sometimes scary. Paul does this with the church in Thessalonica as well. Turn over to 1 Thessalonians chapter 4. We looked at the beginning of this chapter, but just look at the end in verses 13 through 18. He consoles them, he encourages them, he connects with them emotionally here in 1 Thessalonians chapter 4, verse 13. They are worried, they are anxious about those who have already passed, and he gives them some words of encouragement. He says in verse 13, but we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about these who are asleep, that you may not grieve as others uh as others do have, as others who do not have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so, through Jesus, God will bring with him those who have fallen asleep. They will be resurrected. For this we declare to you by a word from the Lord that we who are alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a cry of command, with the voice of an archangel, with the sound of a trumpet of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first, and then we who are alive, who are left, will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we will always be with the Lord. We'll always be with him. Remember John 17. I desire that they be with me where I am, verse 18, and therefore what? Encourage. Encourage one another with these words. These people are anxious. They're anxious that those who have passed away, the men and women that perhaps passed away, have missed the resurrection, they have died and therefore can't participate with Christ, and they'll miss his return. What does Paul do here in their anxiety here? Like a father, he encourages them. Encourages them in a way that helps them walk in a manner worthy of God. He takes their anxiety and he connects it actually to a theological truth. The comfort is actually in verse 14. For since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so through Jesus, God will bring with him those who have fallen asleep. I want you to see this example and realize Paul is connecting with them emotionally, not just with words on a page. Paul has been through a lot. What has been a comfort to him, you think, in his grief and throughout his life, and throughout his ministry, the hope that all of us as Christians should have. And what he's talking about here. This hope is a comfort to him, and he's using it to comfort those Christians, not to grieve as those who have no hope. Now he's not saying, Don't grieve, right? He's not saying don't grieve, it's gonna be okay. No, he's saying just don't grieve like those who don't have the hope that you have. Because you actually have something far better. A father doesn't just say, and he could have said this, hey, it's fine, it'll be okay. Paul could have done that. But he takes the time in this letter to teach them, to speak to them, and to remind them and encourage them. Not just to come alongside, but then connect with them with words. Do you see the picture? If we turn back over again to our main verse, do you see the picture that Paul is continuing when we kind of peel back the layers and we look at the Greek that Paul is painting here, that a father has for his children? Not only do I come alongside, but I connect with them and I talk with them, and then he's gonna say, I charge them. Let's read that again. Hopefully, you have this verse memorized by the end of this sermon. For you know how, like a father with his children, we exhorted each one of you and we encouraged you and we charged you to walk in a manner worthy of God. That word charge. It's a bit different than the first two. But this it means this idea to testify, to to witness. If you look at the Greek there, that's where we get our English word, our our word mart martyr. It's the idea that someone has testified and that cost them everything, even their entire life. And so Paul is charging them, and when he says this in this verse, he's saying, I need you to give everything in your walk, and the walk that helps you walk worthy in a in a manner that's worthy of God. As fathers, we should insist on this. The reason why, if you look at our history throughout the church, we have martyrs is because those who gave a testimony, who are a witness, insisted on who Jesus is and what he did was 100% true. As a father, I charge my girls to do what is right even when it's difficult. It's not just encouragement or exhortation, but it's charging them. It's presenting a mission, a purpose, a direction to walk, to go out and to be a witness. At the end of this letter, Paul ends the whole letter with the charge. He shows them this is what it's like to be a witness, so that people can see God in your life, to walk in a manner that is worthy of God, and what it looks like in your everyday practice. Look at 1 Thessalonians chapter 5 and look at verses 14 through 22 at the very end here. He says, We urge you, right? There's that idea of urging you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the faint-hearted, help the weak, be patient with them all. See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone. Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances, for it is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. Do not quench the spirit with sin and living a life with sin. Do not despise prophecies, do not despise God's word. Verse 21, but test everything. Hold fast to what is good, abstain from every form of evil. Paul covers his bases here. This is what a witness looks like. This is what I'm charging you with. Yeah, every time I drop my girls off at school, there's a mantra that I give them. I tell them, I need you to be good and do good. And I make sure they got that. It's easy to understand, it's easy to remember. But I want to leave them with an understanding of what the expectations are. And that's what we see with this idea of charging. If you find yourself in an unfamiliar situation, I want the outcome to be that you're doing what is right before God. I want them to go out and to be a witness to it. I want others to see God through them. I think all of us as fathers and parents want that for our children. But a father does that. A father provides a mission for them to follow, a vision for them to see, an ideal for them to strive for, an example for them to be. But here's what I love about how Paul ends this. He says, ultimately, in our daily walk, who we rely on is God, our Father, and He is faithful. Look at verse 24. Right, He is faithful. He who calls you is faithful. And in the context, he says, Jesus will return. He surely will do it. But this idea that God, as our Father, is faithful. Are we? I love that the charge doesn't just rest on our shoulders alone. God isn't just sending us out on a mission for us to try to figure it out on our own. He's faithful to complete what he started. He's given us a promise. We looked at that. That's a father. That's a father who is with his children, who's with his people. The type of father that Paul is painting for these Christians here. Paul could not have said what he said at the end of this chapter if he wasn't also, as a father, as a fatherly example, praying without ceasing, giving thanks in every circumstance, helping the weak himself, encouraging the faint-hearted. A father does that. A father leads by example, shows them, not just tells them. And so as we begin the close, let's look at our verse again, one more time, 1 Thessalonians chapter 2, and look at verses 11 and 12. For you know how, like a father with his children, we exhorted each one of you and encouraged you and charged you to walk in a manner worthy of God who calls you into his own kingdom and glory. Now I want us to focus on the end there, because what is the goal of all of this, right? What's the application? To walk in a manner worthy of God. That is a tall order. How can we do and work and walk in such a way that's worthy of God? The idea that God is wanting us to get here is that we need to go out into the world as people who represent Him. We as fathers are wanting our children, men and women, to go out and to grow up being someone who represents Christ. We as Christians, all of us, are Christ's ambassadors, we are told. And God calls us into his own kingdom, we read there. Into his own kingdom. He calls us and to be amongst his people, to share in his glory. Remember John 17? What was Jesus' prayer? Father, I desire that they also, whom you have given me, may be with me where I am, right? In my kingdom, to see my glory that you have given me because you love me before the foundation of the world. What Paul is calling these Christians to do, and ourselves as well, is what Jesus wanted all along to share that love and that glory. And it's what we want for our children as well, and those that are around us. We can go ahead and read 1 Thessalonians chapter 2, and we can look at verse 11 and 12. And I love to peel back and look at the Greek. It's great. But we can also get lost in the Greek too, and wonder how does this apply to us in our daily lives? But right now, one in four young men do not even have a single friend, not a close friend. Depression amongst teenagers is up. Anxiety is up. Emergency room visits for self-harm amongst our young people is up. And the greatest influence right now amongst the youngest generation in their daily life are the influencers they see on social media. And a large part of that is due to the lack of either influence of parents and fatherhood and community. Good parenting is less about the nice yard and getting the grass real green or the big house and the swimming pool and all that's nice. But good parenting is more about the community in which your children grow up. And for us, it's the kingdom that God calls us into. Do our children have adults that they can confide in and connect with other than their parents? Because that's important as well. That's where church can step in beautifully as men and women, and they can be a support system, a spiritual father and mother. And it's hard for me. I know it's hard for me to preach sometimes on this topic because maybe you get it. I feel like I know nothing sometimes. And I question every day whether or not I'm making the right decisions, I'm doing the right thing by my kids, and I pray that you know they just grow up to hopefully love God. I certainly don't want you to think that I'm an expert. I don't want us to also get lost in all the Greek as well. I want you to see how this applies to actual daily life. Because what we see from Paul as a father to the church, a church that had problems, a church that struggled, is a picture not necessarily of perfection, but of one that is actively present and trying and cares, urging them to love God. As we talked about this morning, someone, and Paul painted this picture, who walks with their kids, who is in their life with them actively and communicates and talks with them and leads by example, charging them. That's the picture that Paul's painting. It's the picture I hope you walk away with this morning. Ultimately, who we rely on as Christians is our Father who is faithful and always will be. Question is, are you? For those who are not a Christian, though, for the brokenhearted, for the fatherless, God actually calls us into adoption to be sons and daughters. To call us into his kingdom. If you want to devote your life to the Father, now's the time. Come forward to be baptized for the forgiveness of your sins. That's what you want now? You can come forward now where we stand and we sing.